I earned scholarships to university (graduated with no debt, difficult in USA), have documented and found details of our family history no one else has found, and made countless items by hand for myself and gifts and even sold a few. I’ve also tried transferring it to music activities (since Baby Einstein is filled with great classical music), and that has had some luck, but still not enough to pull him away from the actual Baby Einstein shows. We allow my grandson to be the genius he knows he is and currently he plans to become a marine biologist. That comment about finding 20 mistakes made me laugh out loud. One man, for example, was obsessed with clean books; he felt that “it’s almost rape” if someone writes on a book. Audible (audiobook version) . I never liked pro-wrestling. That and Sonic! My youngest is into Pokémon right now, and it’s a great way to get her to read (more severe dyslexia), plus she is learning to classify Pokémon by abilities, type and region, and I see this as an opportunity to get her to explore the plant or animal each Pokémon is based off of and learn. Thanks so much! 4 months ago he came to a party, and stayed over, and a few more times since. Even fictional stories, or spinoffs of fictional stories written by avid fans. I’m not sure people should be discouraging even obsessions because you never know where they’ll lead and how much they may be needed. But the craziest thing I have learned so far is that you can learn something, from anything. . He can overthink situations and sees things in a more “deep” way. His work has helped me get even more out of the books by providing real world historical parallels. My "obsession" is research. We all struggle in one way or another, and none of our struggles are trivial–not yours, and not mine. As a history major, I love any type of story with a lot of history and lore (which helps include LoTR, HP, Star Wars and of course, The Lloyd Alexander series about a kid named Taran, and Game of Thrones.). All the best to you and your grandson. On New Year’s Eve we had a fight. I deleted his number, and all his messages, blocked him on facebook, and changed my route to work so i didn’t drive past his house. That is not an unusual preoccupation for a fifteen year old girl, but what we need to look at is the intensity and focus. I felt your pain in 7th grade. But what happens when your special interest your obsession is a person? I just wanted to thank you for framing it in a way that not only resonated with us, but also gave us hope that these intense obsessions may one day open up doors we never imagined for him. (And to be fair, any book with 50 grammatical errors should probably be sent back to the publisher!” For the autistic person our obsessions and passions are soothing, calming, a place to hide, decompress, regenerate—a place of quiet peace. The bottom line is that adults with Asperger’s are as interested in sex as everyone else. I remember our first kiss (Friday February 17th 2004) and the whole situation surrounding it. In the world of Sonic the Comic, Doctor Robotnik conquered the world in issue #8. Not so when he reached high school. Thank you for writing this; it’s definitely a piece I’ll share. Am I looking in the right spots? been challenging for him to understand that chris thinks and sees things differently. What did I do? . Book Depository How do I handle this with my 13 yo son? He’s abused because has a Jew, so thus I think that the play is pro Semitic. Perhaps you think it might be possible that you have Asperger’s and are in a relationship with someone who is not an Aspie. So I absolutely agree with you, with one caveat…I also require my children to do something towards chores, do personal hygiene, complete school work, and get some type of exercise. I think professionals don’t diagnose her as autistic because she isn’t difficult enough. Aspergers in Men. But do understand, that just because your issues, or those of other males may seem more severe, it is unfair to trivialize the issues that your female counterparts experience. I wanted to stay roaming the neighborhoods like that all night long, but he needed to meet his friends. 4, eat something. The cause might not be the same for everyone. Because it dawned on me that the pageantry of wrestling is a caricature of social conflicts/interactions. Haha. Aspergers obsessions can help develop you as well as drive you insane whilst trying to function in a neurotypical world. Initially, a woman may admire the man’s intelligence, knowledge, good manners, old-fashioned sensibilities, unconventional charm, child-like qualities, and his practical, rational way of looking at the world. Well the Freddie Mercury one’s a pretty good start, isn’t it? )So who’s to say an Aspie with a Hitler Obsession can’t become a History Profesor, and want to graduate from Princeton University. So in a way, I’m glad I’m not “normal”. We cruised the neighborhood with the windows down, wind in my hair—and his, which was possibly longer than my own. Awww, thank you! I used to adore flags and I still do- even now I can recognise almost every one in the world. Thanks! Thank you so much for sharing your experience! My mum in desperation had to medicate me and gave me simple “to-do” lists, consisting of “1, get up. My 11 year old daughter loves dinosaurs, she draws them, creates 3D dinosaur models, designs dinosaur skins for games on steam which includes learning to take criticism by others when she submits them and then going back and taking the advice on board and learning how to do it better. your lucky your a girl, if you were a man that obsessed the woman woul run a mile before you even got a first date, !!!! He’s told me, I’m the only one who’s understood and that he can be himself with me. I told him I would let him dance with me on my birthday if you know who doesn’t show up. I know this is probably true as he did put a few comments on these forums that he wrote on that a previous celebrity partner brought back memories of this girl as she had the same partner. This has really worried me as he obviously was drawn to her as she would have reminded him of his fixation. With also want to speek up for those with Asperger’s Syndrome and ring also awareness about their Obsessions,a nd how they want fear treatment for their Obsessions.But instead will want to have to because Nuerotypical Society say because I have any kind of Obsession, especially one with Hitler that I might as well spend the rest of my like ofn Welfare with no future. As an autistic myself, I often use these outlets to avoid driving people crazy when I have a new obsession. People included. There’s a definite good guy and a definite bad guy and there’s a story that explains why the good guy hates the bad guy; and why the bad guy is bad. Having AS, I obsess over things. Last year we both supported a female celebrity on the same reality show and it just occurred to me that her dance partner was the same one that danced with the girl who he had a fixation on a few years ago. An except from Twirling Naked in the Streets and No-One Noticed…. I can spend entire days reading topics on Internet forums and blogs that many may view as time wasting but, for me, it is a hobby and one which I enjoy immensely. “You just described our son, and it feels so good to imagine him to grow in your steps.” Since women want love from relationships, they often try to be or appear to be sexier to attract the most loving and supporting men. I hope the advice is applicable or at least gives you ideas. One was just considered a typical thing for my demographic while the other isn’t. Here are seven famous people living with Asperger’s. The Asperger love guide: A practical guide for adults with Asperger’s syndrome to seeking, establishing and maintaining successful relationships. The severity and types of obsessive-compulsive symptoms were measured using, respectively, the ten-item Yale-Brown Obsessive-Compulsive Scale (Y-BOCS) (Reference Goodman, Price and Rasmussen Goodman et al, 1989) and its ancillary Symptom Checklist (Y-BOCS-SC).The Y-BOCS-SC is a list of more than 50 examples of obsessions and compulsions grouped … Sonic the Hedgehog was useful to me because I was able to apply it to so many other areas of my life. | Autistic, Not Weird, Aspergers, Obsessions, Routines, and Why I Love the Way I Am – Mrs B Writes, Why autistic people struggle with comfort zones, and what can be done about it - Autistic Not Weird, Ten reasons your autistic child needs to learn chess, When should I tell my child they’re autistic, and how do I tell them? ), but he doesn’t like those. Although there is much more to be learned, research suggests that people with Asperger’s Syndrome have the same sexual interests and issues as people in the general population (Lawson, 2005; Henault, 2006). That doesn’t mean that they don’t want a relationship. Tell him Bill Gates and Mark Zuckerberg (definitely) probably have Aspergers, as does much of Silicon Valley and Wall Street. We fought since the beginnings (with the specialists, s, s, s, s, ….) My son is “obsessed” with Baby Einstein. Very, very grateful for the comment. Unfortunately he hadn’t really been looking for anything more, but 3 days after the deed I emotionally blackmailed him into going out with me (although it’s taken me 7 years to realise that this was what i did). He’s memorized the “heels” and the “faces” and the backstories and rivalries. I needed to be home before midnight or my father would flip out anyway I told myself. . When reading about your 7 year old self I felt like I was reading about my son at that age. Sigh. I dealt with these obsessions by writing fanfiction and drawing artwork. share. I began to take it personally, not understanding that others may have feelings and needs different than my own. The cheque bounced, and after another argument, I ended up helping him do a bank transfer so that he paid within a month, and could have the court order removed from his credit record. Perhaps less devoted types would flee when heartache strikes, or trouble comes, and it did, it always does-but that unwillingness to let go, can also be a strength. I don’t want to take it away, but he has trouble connecting with other kids as it is, and when he constantly talks about and acts like a show made for babies under one year of age, it’s really becoming an issue. Be the first to share what you think! . that guy was whacked out. even if a lot of the facts are useless! We got together (for 3 months) when I was 15, after he’d left high school (where his friends had mocked me constantly as “the girl who fancies James!”). Even if the only benefit the world got from dinosaurs was visitors and funding for museums as their sideshow attraction, that means museums have extra funding to use trying to learn more about our history so we know more about ourselves and what not to be doing. My 3 year old son is Gifted and obsessed about Thomas the Tank Engine. And therefore, it’s something unhealthy. He wants to save the sawfish species from extinction. , Oh No! Nowadays, dinosaurs arent my only interest and I don’t put as much time on them. Spiders are awesome. Not touchy feely. But if people around you understand then you don’t have to be difficult, right? Save my name, email, and website in this browser for the next time I comment. My roommate has aspergers and unfortunately he is now obsessed with my 10 month old son. Mostly I just find links to wikis and so on. I cannot disagree that the a male aspie has distinctly differing issues when it comes to dating and romantic issues. But I never pass up on watching a documentary. To her Nursery, its an unhealthy obsession that we should discourage so that he interacts with his peers all the time. -Abbie Rieber, It is a sad fact Abbie, but you might have been right. But no, this relationship did not survive, I moved on…and on…and on…and some got better, some did not. I was/am into reading loads of books, crafting with yarn and cloth, genealogy and history. She was on a reality dance show and that was where his obsession started. I’d invited him, and I thought maybe just maybe he would show-up and surprise me—and he did. it … And I hope I’m right in thinking that the tide is turning nowadays- that the more we understand Asperger’s and the more teachers are trained to deal with it, the less of a “nuisance” we’ll become. Here are some tips on how to have a successful relationship with someone on the Autism Spectrum: Get him diagnosed. Review page on Goodreads I would be very grateful if anyone who has had the same fixations as my boyfriend could give me an insight as to how he feels and if I should be worried and also how to deal with it. [Edit- rather beautifully, he did end up reading this. I was diagnosed with Aspergers 2 months ago, but there’s no provision, in my area, for mental health support for autistic adults beyond diagnosis. They’ll stay away from you instead of telling you what you did wrong. View Entire Discussion (0 Comments) More posts from the aspergers community. Post was not sent - check your email addresses! Thanks for your feedback. ( Log Out /  Sometimes they are one and the same- it’s other people’s perceptions that differ. I know this is 7-8 months late, but I play a game online called ARK: Survival Evolved. report. Just to be clear, I love chess because it’s a chance to outsmart someone without even talking to them. I couldn’t see it; I couldn’t understand it; his behavior made no sense to me. Learning concepts such as “personal space”, for example, are perhaps better learned while your daughter has a genuine interest in socialising. ? Thanks a lot for the comment and the compliments! Asperger's syndrome (AS, Asperger syndrome, Asperger disorder) is an autism spectrum disorder. Ps2: Sorry for the accent (it is French accent). All kinds. I’ve been told by neurotypical psychiatrist that I love him, but I don’t know. Since there is no internal dialogue helping them read social cues for answers, they rely on facts and prompts from others to make sure they have control of the situation. 2, have a shower. The first few months were perfect. We just express it differently. There were often a dozen different ways you could reach the signpost at the end. Fill in your details below or click an icon to log in: You are commenting using your WordPress.com account. Good point! If you want (anonymously or not), I could post your comment to Autistic Not Weird’s Facebook page and ask the community for advice? But as time went on it became harder, and harder to let go—to understand this strange need for his friends. Unlike the Beano, which I also loved, Sonic the Comic had some incredible plotlines, was big on character development, and valued storytelling over comedy. He didn’t stay. He didn’t try to meet her in real life at all, but he was obsessed with finding everything out about her online. Now for someone who understands his own aspergers, this is pretty creepy. - Autistic Not Weird, Twenty tips for aspiring writers, from an autistic novelist, Ten vital reasons to never, ever share an autism meltdown video, Dear perfectionists – it’s ok to do things imperfectly, Disability Story Spotlight: Roll With It by Jamie Sumner - Lucinda Thee, The labelling issue, by a ‘mildly autistic’ ‘high-functioning’ ‘person with Asperger Syndrome’. Quite a compliment at the end there! Their need for social contact is normally far less than a neurotypical partner’s. fortunately, people with asperger's learn when their behavior is inappropriate and change it. Asperger’s syndrome is a developmental disorder that causes those afflicted to have more trouble being in social situations, to seek out solitary places when they feel stressed, to maintain consistency in their daily activities and to be sensitive to certain stimuli, such as loud noises and bright lights. Love or Obsession: When a Person Becomes an Aspie’s Special Interest, Aspie Writer: Twirling Naked in the Streets–and No-one Noticed–Growing up with undiagnosed Autism, The Autistic College Student and Executive Dysfunction, Twirling Naked in the Streets and No-One Noticed…, What’s so Special About a Special Interest? . But mostly insane. Me and James had hugs fights via text and messenger, until eventually he told me he didn’t want to see or speak to me again, and wouldn’t even meet me to say good bye. For example, when I was about seven my main interest was dinosaurs. Thank you for trying to educate the world. Severity and types of OCD symptoms. best. If there’s one thing I want people to take away from this article, it’s this: If you believe in parallel universes, there’ll be a universe where I obediently cast Sonic aside. The Saturday Night Live star has also opened up about his Asperger's, saying it helps his career. For young autistic children who have limited play skills, special interests can be something they enjoy. Among those who knew about my Asperger’s, there were a small number of adults I encountered who clearly believed it was an ‘autistic obsession’, rather than honest enthusiasm like other people have. But here are some lesser-known things about the condition from those who know. So when he’d wanted to loose his, I was there, attractive, and more than willing. P.S. Ps: my son (8) an I are preparing a lettre to the author of Geronimo Stilton: he found 20 mistakes about dinosaurs in these books. We insisted that he join other things to help him gain social skills – bowling, social skills groups, and for the first time, he came how excited about joining a new club at school – a gaming club. Now, however, I also love Marvel movies, Star Wars, Gravity Falls, and a myriad of other things. One lady explained how she was questioned when she went to bed by her AS partner as to whether she had showered and cleaned her teeth. I had no idea that I was being creepy and annoying and wasn’t diagnosed until after he got mad at me. Around the same time, I had another younger cousin who was just growing into Sonic… same story again. he probably sences something is wrong and might think your going off him, aspies need to be told what your thinking so they know whats going on ! On the other hand, they can be very organised and encourage you to be so, too. Sometimes other adults think I “encourage” his “obsession” to much. Of course, because because Aspies really just get Germopobia and become neat freaks, but don’t ever become Mathematicians due to a Mathematics Obsessions, or invent the theory of realitivity, or become U.S. Presidnets and U.s. And yes, I’ll also admit I love chess because I tend to win a lot. For example, when I was about seven my main interest was dinosaurs. There is one fixation though that I really find hard to deal with and it’s affecting our relationship and I wonder if any one with aspergers, particularly men, who have the same thing and can maybe help me with dealing with this. Or at the very least, deficient. I hope others don’t give up and think they are a nuisance and not worth worrying about. Warning: the results may challenge you. I had no idea what was going on and why I literally developed an overnight obsession with him. But whereas most young children would express their love of dinosaurs by pretend roaring and stomping around the playground, I expressed my love by telling people I wanted to be a palaeontologist (and telling them how to spell it), memorising geological eras from Precambrian to Pleistocene, learning Latin words so I knew what dinosaur names meant, and reaching the stage where I could grab a piece of paper and write down 91 different species by memory (yes, this happened when I was in Year 2 [first grade]). An individual having an intense interest (borderline obsession) with one or two specific topics is a common characteristic of Aspergers in adults.. */. During one of our many adventures and nights on the town, Parker told me that he had a syndrome called Asperger’s… Here’s how my life changed. An aspie dating a neurotypical must learn to adjust to the other person’s needs. It didn’t last, and I sank into a deep depression when he broke it off, and started going out with a new girl. A person with aspergers can be just as violent or passive as anyone else, as asperger’s is a classification of … I know wrestling has helped teach him that, because he’ll say “Ya’ know Mom it’s like that time Rowdy Roddy Piper…. I`m already planning on using these words to describe it to others who may not understand me. Extreme preoccupation with own needs and obsessions and limited ability to see the needs of others. A willingness to work with others and see past the flaws, and keep our promises. It hurt like hell, cos no one knew about my Asperger’s at the time. , Pingback: What’s so Special About a Special Interest? Haha. They love routines. She used to love it so much and I encouraged her along the way! I just need to learn how to rein it in sometimes! Keys are an extremely useful invention. Strange part: I was Jewish. Asperger's syndrome is characterized by a degree of impairment in language and communication skills, and repetitive or restrictive thoughts or behaviors. I believe he will if he truly desires to do that. There’s been emotional abuse on both sides, financial abuse, and a lot of hurt. If you’re diagnosed as gifted, it’s accepted as natural for you to bury yourself in your interests. I want to help people. Those with this condition, however, have always displayed many of the same types of characteristics throughout time. She’s also started working on maps for another dinosaur game. It’s like telling someone who is black not to talk about being a black person, and have to talk about only white things. That’s a really good point. Not just the games either- I was still reading Sonic the Comic, despite being ‘far too old’ for it. This need for their partner's cleanliness before intimate contact can become an obsession in the partner with AS. In a successful relationship there is the expectation of regular expressions of love and affection. For the autistic person our obsessions and passions are soothing, calming, a place to hide, decompress, regenerate—a place of quiet peace. To me the difference is an obsession prevents the person from doing important things such as eating, sleeping and going to the toilet. Your email address will not be published. Now as a history graduate I think, fanfiction has helped evolve my love of reading, and virtually all the spending money I have available goes out to books, in the hopes that I can become a scholar one day and teach others my viewpoint, just as you are doing now. ( Log Out /  People react with, ‘Aren’t you too old to be so obsessed with fictional characters?’ No, because without them, I’d be depressed and lost. But one was “expected”, the other was not. Maybe for trying other shows, activities etc. Inevitably, he split up with the girlfriend (because she was a money grabbing whore who was using his photography passion to further her makeup up artistry business, and using him to look after her daughter.) . When focused on an interest or area to the exclusion of everything else, and everyone else in your life, is this not considered obsession? So, yeah I need my obsession. Jackson, L. (2002). I had to travel quite a twisted path to get my son into university as he did not have the marks to get in. I met him when I was 12 and a few months, now I’m 2 months off turning 24…. Create a free website or blog at WordPress.com. I’m gonna have to get back to you on that one! The Love of Animals and Asperger’s Syndrome. LOL It’s a good thing I didn’t like any of my teachers. Oh, and let’s not forget his love and obsession for shoes. She’d absolutely adore it (wouldn’t recommend anything other than single player for an 11 year old though). “All Encompassing” precisely sums up the intensity of an Aspie’s preoccupation with someone or something that interests them. We recommend moving this block and the preceding CSS link to the HEAD of your HTML file. I wish people would write about ways to stop this kind of obsession. I’m trying to teach him how to handle his relationship with this girl and I feel like he is constantly emotional and upset. 12. For the reblog *and* the compliments! ( Log Out /  Unfortunately, during our senior year of high school, we had a toxic friend that strongly discouraged my friend’s love for Black Butler, and discouraged it so much she treated her like complete dirt. Love can be joyous and healthy but obsession can be seen as unwanted attention, smothering affection, and in the extreme…stalking. Trying to move on has been a difficult thing, so her passion has been severely reduced our of fear of being judged. we had a strange ‘on-off’ relationship until I was 17, and then we went out again, this time for 3 years. He sent me a cheque, which i cashed in, then I made the mistake of unblocking him, and sending him a “thank you” message. We have the same love of things as everyone else. The most common symptom of Asperger's syndrome is the obsessive interest in a single object or topic. Very happy for you. Thanks for the comment. I think that’s a good way of putting it. I walked home in snow and ice most days that winter, because maybe 30% of the time I’d find him along the way and we’d walk together. Change ). Thank you! We’ve always allowed his process to be self-guided, but always wondered how those things would translate once he got older and it was so refreshing and humbling to hear your story. Here are seven famous people living with Asperger’s. I wish he would forgive me . It’s great to hear that your son had teachers who would give up their time for him- even if it didn’t carry on into high school, I’m sure that personalised approach when he was a child had an impact that stayed with him right into adulthood. My client once planned a surprise birthday party for her boyfriend – which he walked out of immediately upon arrival. It’s not the storytelling and character development of Sonic the Comic (we’re on the Archie Comics series), but his fascination is just as real and engrossing. To make matters worse, the mind-blind teenager will usually never know if she steps over this line. Well, every now and again I just do a search for my name on Google. Thanks for writing this. My parents think it’s a weird obsession. Well if you did that in Society today , you would be a flat-ot racist, but we do the same thing to people on the Autsim Spectrum, and Asperger’s Sydrome to nto at all talk or bring up their Obsessions, because their odd, or offensive, or people get tired of them hearing some with Asperger’s/ Autism talk about hem all the time. This came about when I would take, at face value so-to-speak, what the "main stream" medias (books, magazines, news, state accredited education, etc.) talk to him ! To us, it’s his way of processing information in a way that limits the information overload that he gets. And a part of me thanks the Sonic the Hedgehog comics.]. Hey guys thank you for watching my video *more stuff below, :)*. I’m all obsessed about facts. I began to feel like a stalker, because I knew every detail there was to know about her. Another point worth thinking about. I’d never considered any other scenario in my head—ever. Posted by 6 days ago. She’s taught her self how to use unreal tournament engine to design models and terrain. Like you or someone else says something and then later you can’t get what happened out of your head no matter what you try, and worse your brain interprets what was said in a negative light and beats you up for it and comes up with all kinds of negative reasons for it. Asperger’s men work well with routines and generally do not like spontaneity. ), My main creative outlet is modelmaking. he isn’t an alien ! I used to get dinosaur books but when I read them, I realized that I already knew everything in them. Now exploring career options make it clear that it ’ s people do show and that s... S person version of an interest in Freddie Mercury has taught me the difference an... 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